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1.29.2012

A Reflection


To sit right on these rocks, I promised myself to be at this exact spot on the last Sunday of the following year after it happened and reflect on the progress I have made, may it be something positive or the opposite after a period of three hundred and sixty five days.

Being alone and unoccupied felt strange and difficult as it was something new in the beginning. Days passed that I would be unoccupied and friends ask if I were alright. I was and still am, though I remember drinking constantly but not excessively every night. I drank for about four months straight possibly missing about seven days in between up to the point where I got the "wake up call", a night where my drink was possibly drugged by a random idiot and my body pretty much could not take it. I made it home but it was a struggle. Never again.

I asked her at the time when the last moment was that she was completely happy when we were together and she said it was when we went for a little walk and sat down by those rocks as we watch the sunset. So then I visited the spot and see I what kind of emotion it would trigger. I tend to mentally dive right into the issues I face and try to come up with a logical solution instead of avoiding them and have the same problem get to me in my most unexpected, vulnerable state.



A whole year has gone and I have already checked off quite a few things that were on my bucket list and I'm just glad things are doing well. I gave myself just a year to analyze what it is that I need and now that the year is over, there are no other excuse that I can give myself to slack.

The interesting thing is, it has been a while and we haven't cross paths.
I wonder how that would end up like. 
Will one acknowledge the other or are the two of us just back to being strangers?

"Strangers Again"





The woman that I dedicated my life to for seven years and nine months who I thought I'd be with for the rest of my life is now just somebody that I used to know.


"Somebody That I Used To Know"

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